There's no time line to life...its going to be a lonely life if you don't start to let go of the things that pulling you down..We lose the ability to care about anyone's feeling but our own; we become reckless; selfish; inconsiderate and void of boundaries. Sometimes judgemental and controlling ,we expect everyone to do things in exactly the way we imagine ,to be in your brain ; and when they don't... not only is that person an idiot but their also a monster to you . We are all screwed up ; we are all just trying to figure it out ...we get addicted to being furious that we don't see the truth right infront of us !!!
We don't nurse our pain...we all don't need some kind of sloppy paint by numbers example to understand what pain is . We don't have magic were we move on from the hurt and pain; we neither are elastic "stretching the pain from now to eternity "
It's not healthy to be a sad and an angry person... frozen in time . I know that feeling waking up every morning; painful awful and confusing , I hate that we have to find a place to hide that mess to even be a person ,I hate knowing that no matter how well I hide it ,the very next morning it's just gonna be there waiting for me full force !!!
I sometimes think that maybe I am addicted to being furious...to feeling the rage of the hurt and pain; feels like I'm tied to it ...if I let it go then I let it go. Life sucks ...and I try alot of things to let it suck less ; yea maybe it always hadn't work but yeah I'm still trying . I'm always trying maybe it's always going to suck alittle ; I just think its speaks how strong we come out . All the lessons has to mean something !!!
It has to change you ...maybe if you let it ; it can change you for the better but it won't until you let go . Stop obsessing and enjoy the this of this ...instead of worrying about the end of this . Stop fixating on the end !!