When things seems powerless...be bold try something new ,something different.
How do you do it??? We all get shaken up at some point but how do we be bold?We got up this morning...how did you do it? You push your pain aside and do what needs to be done. You get mad at yourself that you didn't do more after all of life's dramas you've faced; and you mad at yourself for not doing any less . We get exhausted by navigating a world that sees us as a threat ; it's this constant nagging worry that never goes away , if I do manage to forget then it's a comment or a look ,or the news reminds me that I have to be careful ; and it steals all my mental and emotional energy !!!
Everything and nothing has changed ...all the lessons learnt are the coal that keeps the fire hot ; we learn when we learn. The shame we feel of having taken so long to learn ,that can be useful as long as we use it well. Once we know better we have to do better ; we feel we don't have the capacity to stand up to an abusive power ; but we do ,you have the power to stand up and say when something is wrong; you have the power to call injustice when you see it. You have the power to make sure you can breath !!!
This year has been soo much ; one thing after another with no time to recover. Your comfort has been a big part of your problems for so long . We all are looking for clarity...everyone out there is all not bad; they all individuals with different prospective. There's this saying "you do the crime ,you do the time"; when you make mistakes you get to learn from them. We all get exhausted by everyday life; we get tired, mad and sad for trying to explain why I'm mad and sad !!!
I'm mad because I have to take a magic pause everytime I'm being tracked by earballs; or when people who are in life threatening danger choose to take there chances by themselves rather than being rescued. But you know mostly I'm scared because no matter how tired I am; how mad I get ; how sad I get ,there's nothing I can say to change their minds; there's nothing I can do to make them see me as the person that I am. I had so many dark thoughts ,sometimes I doubt my own goodness; we make mistakes, we learn from them and we do better next time. That's how goodness works ,it's not about purity it's about growth and being humble !!!