Who are we to judge the lifes people live?. We all are not perfect and we don't have to be...before we start pointing fingers make sure our hands are first clean. People often judge you as though it was their place...as though they never stood in your way. Who are they to decide if I'm wrong or right? How many times have they had to fight my fight (im guessing not as much as I have). I survived myself the best that I knew and I survived myself despite what life put me through...people called me the loud one, the strong one. But no one knew that I was the scared one...walking on eggshells afraid to be the hated one. Afraid to be alive but also afraid to die...afraid to live and afraid of trying, I was conditioned to be happy when I was actually lonely and sad !!!
I think there's a point in your healing journey where you stop trying to convince other people to do the right thing, you just observe their choices, understand their character and decide what you're going to allow in your life. There's a message in the way a person treats you...you just gotta listen. I started calling myself back...the girl who loved living, the girl who danced and sang instead of walking. The girl who's eyes sparkled...and fireworks in her soul. I started playing music again...listening to my favorite Playlist, hoping that this girl within me will come out...I started looking for beautiful moments to experience, so she would feel safe enough to show herself. I know she is in there buried deep inside of me...she needed to be reminded of her kindness and to resurface again !!!