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How am I feeling ...I don't know cause there's so many things going on right now.So much to deal with as if my life is not complicated enough ; being tested positive really shook my world. I'm the most careful responsible human I know...always masking up,washing my hands regularly, keeping my guard up all the time and boom "corona" hit me hard . I was devastated when I received my pcr results you have been tested "positive" the thoughts that flooded my mind were scary,confusing, I'm trying to go back to see were I slipped up,How? Where?When?just a whole lot of unanswered questions!!!

It started on Christmas evening the aches and pains ,the spiking in temperature ,the tight chest and dry cough,lost my voice...I had the most restless ,painful night. Every part of my body ached so much, my eyes felt about three sizes too big;and that feeling like someone enormous sitting on my chest . "I know everyone experiences covid differently, but wow these symptoms are wild"; "I had a different kind of headache than I've ever had,"along with a fever and sore throat and let me not get started on the body aches. All I can say is this experience of covid has been the most challenging and difficult thing I had to endure . I couldn't understand this made me feel good one day and like shit the next day !!!

With the help of medication ,bed rest ,liquids (Maureen's homemade concoctions)made it bearable...however it's been the most horrific scary time in my life; I lost so many loved ones to "corona" and you can imagine the thoughts that where sweeping through my mind. I felt like crap ,didn't wanna get out of bed...pity party feeling ...why me?why me?. It's like I had both my hands thrown in the the air like a little child getting goodies...screaming "pick me pick me" cos all bad things just seem to follow me around one after the other (sucks hey) !!!

But honestly I would never had made it if it weren't for the amazing people in my life ...sad to say it was mostly friends than family. I'm a high risk human with all of underlying conditions (asthma, recovering a tumor, thyroids, high blood pressure and the list continues) so yes I was in a panic mode but luckily for me the man upstairs has bigger and better plans for me . This special sister friend"Maureen Govender" like I'd mentioned had contacts in very high places ...she made things happen, moved heaven and earth for me. My siblings omg we agree to disagree ,we argue and we kinda stop chatting at times...but I saw the worry in each of their eyes,we are a very dramatic and emotional gang...but the love for each other is never questioned !!!

So yes that was my near death experience...I had one two many but this one was too close to home. It thought me alot ,appreciate the people who will do anything for you, don't go around disliking or hating for selfish reasons, forgive and say sorry cos we don't know what tomorrow holds. Being positive was an eye opener for showed me the people who stayed ,the people who walked away,the people who wanted limelight and the people who cared from their hearts . So going forward there's going to be alot of cutting ,deleting and segregation on my part ,I'm not going to sit at a table when I'm not wanted and people the virus is out there it's not going nowhere, not anytime soon; take every necessary precaution and treat every early symptom ,don't live in denial and think it's just the flu...believe me it's not. So my advice to you is keep wearing the damn mask,keep washing your hands, and stay socially distant !!!


Stay safe


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Love yourself first... Choose those who choose you...I bet it bothers some people that "at your weakest you're still stronger than them". If standing up for yourself burns bridges; own your matches to


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